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A man and woman face each other across a table at a downtown bistro, looking nervous and awkward. There is a stiff formality to the way they sit—no slouching. It remains to be seen if it will pick up speed, gain altitude, and soar skyward . Sometimes they lead to burning love; sometimes they go down in flames. With those thoughts in mind, now it’s time to think about specific first date questions. What should I know about you that I’d never think to ask about? Who was your favorite schoolteacher or college professor? Now that you’ve got questions for your first date, try setting one up on e Harmony. Sometimes we have people asking what kinds of questions they should ask on their mini dates.
It really does depend on what is important to them and it is a very individual thing.
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Think of conversation as a tennis match in which the players lob the ball back and forth. They ask personal or sensitive questions that put the other person on the defensive. If feeling inhibited is a problem for some people, others go to the opposite extreme: they use a date as an opportunity to purge and vent.
Should the relationship evolve, there will be plenty of time to get into weighty topics. When a person reveals too much too soon, it can give a false sense of intimacy.
In reality, premature or exaggerated revelations are due more to boundary issues, unresolved pain, or self-centeredness than true intimacy. Maybe your first date questions will lead you to discover that this person is your soul mate—or maybe not.